Sarcastic Tips for Newbies

FAQ and threads for those just starting to hike the Colorado 14ers.
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greenonion
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Re: Sarcastic Tips for Newbies

Post by greenonion »

Imply, or go ahead and outright claim, that you are a big bad wolf preying on sheep while simultaneously admitting you are in depression and recovering from bunnyslopeitis.
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Dan_Suitor
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Re: Sarcastic Tips for Newbies

Post by Dan_Suitor »

If you climb a 14er, you will be unique and special.
Cairns will never mislead you, and it’s pronounced “Karen's”.
:lol: :lol: :lol:
Century Bound, eventually.
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Salient
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Re: Sarcastic Tips for Newbies

Post by Salient »

greenonion wrote: Sun Mar 28, 2021 10:01 am Imply, or go ahead and outright claim, that you are a big bad wolf preying on sheep while simultaneously admitting you are in depression and recovering from bunnyslopeitis.
This sounds oddly specific
Be the best you that you can be.
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AnnaG22
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Re: Sarcastic Tips for Newbies

Post by AnnaG22 »

Salient wrote: Tue Mar 30, 2021 1:46 pm
greenonion wrote: Sun Mar 28, 2021 10:01 am Imply, or go ahead and outright claim, that you are a big bad wolf preying on sheep while simultaneously admitting you are in depression and recovering from bunnyslopeitis.
This sounds oddly specific
Aye aye, Captain
"The love of wilderness is more than a hunger for what is always beyond reach; it is also an expression of loyalty to the earth, the earth which bore us and sustains us, the only home we shall ever know, the only paradise we ever need – if only we had the eyes to see." -Ed Abbey

"I get scared sometimes—lots of times—but it's not bad. You know? I feel close to myself. When I'm out there at night, I feel close to my own body, I can feel my blood moving, my skin and my fingernails, everything, it's like I'm full of electricity and I'm glowing in the dark—I'm on fire almost—I'm burning away into nothing—but it doesn't matter because I know exactly who I am." from The Things They Carried
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PaulVee
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Re: Sarcastic Tips for Newbies

Post by PaulVee »

Don't flash the entire world from the summit, it might distract other hikers
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bergsteigen
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Re: Sarcastic Tips for Newbies

Post by bergsteigen »

Never, ever go on a trip without getting the most up to the second beta on every aspect of the day. Under absolutely no circumstances should you “be the beta” because having an adventure should be avoided at all costs! The worst would be having to go to plan B or C.
"Auto racing, bull fighting, and mountain climbing are the only real sports ... all others are games." - Ernest Hemingway (or was it Barnaby Conrad?)
Your knees only get so many bumps in life, don't waste them on moguls!
“No athlete is truly tested until they’ve stared an injury in the face and come out on the other side stronger than ever” -anonymous

http://otinasadventures.com @otina
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Sbenfield
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Re: Sarcastic Tips for Newbies

Post by Sbenfield »

Always hike with at least 10 others and carry a gun in the event you see a wild animal
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jaymz
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Re: Sarcastic Tips for Newbies

Post by jaymz »

Spend $150-$200 on the burliest hiking boots you can find. It is the Rockies, after all.
"But in every walk with Nature, one receives far more than he seeks."
John Muir
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Stratosfearsome
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Re: Sarcastic Tips for Newbies

Post by Stratosfearsome »

Drive as high as you can up remote 4x4 roads in winter. Go for it! You're special and so is your truck.
Nobody climbs 14ers anymore, they’re too crowded.
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